September 25, 2015

“Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the door frames of your houses and on your gates.” Deuteronomy 6:4-9

If Raising Home Run Kids was easy there would be a lot of them and our culture would be on an upswing. That doesn’t seem to be the case.

As I mentioned Sunday, raising kids is a bit of a misnomer because we our end game is to raise healthy adults. It takes healthy adults with an intentional plan for raising up the next generation of healthy adults.

There are three virtues that need to be trained into Home Run Kids. Yesterday I dealt with the first one, honesty. Today I comment on the second one; thankfulness.

Darling adorable little newborns enter the world completely and utterly self-centered. Growing larger and older does nothing to curb that tendency. Selfishness must be disciplined out of the nature of each child. There are a number of reasons selfishness must be confronted in a child.

Selfishness leads to ingratitude. Ungrateful people are unhappy, unsatisfied and discontented people. That is not Home Run Kid Material. That is home to third base runner material.

Selfishness leads to inconsiderate kids. When a kid is primarily centered on his own interests, concerns and desires he has little left for others. This is not Home Run Kid material.

Selfishness leads to impatient kids. Self-centered kids tend to be self-indulgent kids who want what they want and they want it now. This kid will never make it out of the dugout.

Selfishness leads to impulsive kids. Self-centered kids are not into delayed gratification. They will fall prey to being manipulated into make emotional decisions. That’s not a winning formula for life.

If you want to raise a Home Run Kid, teach him to be thankful. The key to overcoming selfishness is to lead him to a personal relationship with Christ. Becoming a Christian demands humility and repentance. One of the certain signs of a true believer is gratitude. How else can you respond to the amazing grace of God?

Those who would Raise Home Run Kids should also teach their kid to say, “Thank you” to every kindness shown to them.

In addition to saying, “Thank you” Home Run Kids should be taught to send “thank you” notes for every gift or kindness shown to them.

Home Run Kids are grateful kids, kids who have connected at home plate and have rounded first base!

Coach ‘em up parents!

September 24, 2015

“Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the door frames of your houses and on your gates.” Deuteronomy 6:4-9

In my message last Sunday I shared three fundamental truths you must teach your kids. This week I will share three attitudes or characteristics Home Run Kids must demonstrate. 

Today I will comment on the first:

HONESTY

Sin is always rooted in a lie. Sin originated in a lie and has corrupted the human nature with flawed judgment. Our human instinct is to lie in order to save ourselves. It is natural to tell ourselves lies.

We want to lie but we hate being lied to. We want to live in a world where we can lie but everyone else must tell the truth. Such is the depravity that plagues us.

When you lie you lose because:

• ·  Lies break reliability. One lie breaks trust and each successive lie further erodes your trustworthiness.
• ·   Lies break relationships. People can’t trust a liar and it is hard to love someone you can’t trust.
• ·   Lies blur reality. A lie originates in a false reality and moves further from it. Lucifer really thought he “could be like the most high” – not really!

Parents committed to raising Home Run Kids must confront the dishonesty bred into their fallen nature and speak truth into their life.

How do you do that?

Pastor Kevin Myers, who wrote “Home Run Life”, shares a successful strategy he employed with his kids.  He declared “when one lies everyone lies”.

When he caught his kid in a lie he would confront them with their lie and then say something like, “Ok, if you can lie to me then I will lie to you. Remember when I promised you that new bike for your birthday? I lied. And, remember when I said you could go to the sleep over Friday night? I lied. And, oh, remember when I promised to take you to the Braves game tonight? I lied.

Kids want to know they can count on their parents. When they see the effect of their lying it may cause them to reconsider.

Kids need to learn that sin has consequences and it should cost them something when they lie. For Kevin’s kids this approach worked.

The ultimate goal for parents seeking to Raise Home Run Kids is to keep kids from lying to themselves. That is a Home Plate and First Base issue.

Step up to the plate!

September 23, 2015

“Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads.  Write them on the door frames of your houses and on your gates.” Deuteronomy 6:4-9

Home plate is the connection base where you help your kids get connected to God by faith. The goal at home plate is a kid who loves God.

First base is the character base where the love of God takes residence in the heart of your kid and shapes it to be like Christ. The goal at first base is a kid who finds a healthy self-love.

Raising Home Run Kids means learning to coach your kids how to win at home and first.

There are three parenting models you could choose to Raise Home Run Kids. I want to review them with you.

Model One: Discipline Without Emotion

“Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.” Ephesians 6:4

This could be the overly diligent parent who in his desire to Raise a Home Run Kids he just tries a little too hard. In his effort to instill the nurture and admonition of the Lord he errs on the side of rules while neglecting the relationship. Rather than being a parent figure he becomes a drill sergeant.

Another variation of this model is a parent who disciplines with negative emotions allowing anger or frustration to enter into his discipline.

Model Two: Emotion Without Discipline

Sometimes an insecure or immature parent will want to be liked by his kid and is hesitant to apply any discipline to his child. The result is a spoiled kid who has not secure boundaries and who learns to be ruled by feelings. Such a child will struggle to make good decisions because his reality becomes determined by how he feels at the moment. This kid will also struggle to become emotionally mature due to his impatience and inability to delay gratification.

Likewise, this kid will find it difficult to reach spiritual maturity because of his undisciplined ways. Galatians 5 describes a kid like this.

“So I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. For the flesh desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the flesh. They are in conflict with each other, so that you are not to do whatever you want. But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the law. The acts of the flesh are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God.” Galatians 5:16-21

When you read this Scripture substitute the word “feelings” for the word “flesh” and you see where this immature way of living leads. This is NOT a home run life!

Model Three: Emotion With Discipline

This is the model that Raises Home Run Kids. Such parents teach their kid to say “no” to selfish emotions and desires and say “yes” to God’s Word and God’s way. Paul describes this parenting model in Galatians 5:16-18; 22-25

“So I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. For the flesh desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the flesh. They are in conflict with each other, so that you are not to do whatever you want. But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the law.” “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit.” Galatians 5:16-18 & 22-25

Living a life disciplined by the Word of God and led by His Spirit will be a life set free to express and experience a wide range of emotions!

Three models of child-rearing. Only one of them produces Home Run Kids.

Do you recognize your parenting model?

September 22, 2015

“Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it.” Proverbs 22:6

One of the things that is so charming and disarming about infants is their innocence. They have no idea of the potential dangers that surround them on every side. The learning curve they face is extremely steep and possibly disastrous if not carefully nurtured by adults who love them. As the old expression goes, “What they don’t know could kill them.”

Adults (parents) know things that kids don’t. The responsibility of a parent is to teach their children those things they know that their children have not yet discovered. Parents much teach their kids the things that they know that their children haven’t yet learned, especially the harmful things. We often hear horrifying stories of tragic things happening to children left unguarded or unsupervised.

In our teaching paradigm of the Home Run Life, parents must teach their kids how to connect with God at home plate and then how to run the bases in a winning way.

Even though I played college baseball, I didn’t learn about playing baseball at that level. There are a lot of big, strong, hard throwing guys at that level. Someone who didn’t know what he is doing could get seriously hurt! I learned all the rules and skills and fundamental in the safety of practices under the supervision of little league coaches. They knew all the things I didn’t know and patiently taught me. Because of the training and knowledge they imparted to me I was able to adapt at each higher level of competition.

Such is the role of parents with their kids and the Home Run Life is a helpful paradigm for healthy parenting.

That is why we are dedicating five weeks on the teaching series “Raising Home Run Kids”.

In case sports analogies don’t register with you, I share with you one of my favorite jokes to illustrate my point.

A Roman Catholic Priest, an Anglican priest and a Baptist preacher were standing near a river conversing when the subject of which church was nearest to the teaching of God arose. The Roman Catholic priest said that of course there was no argument that the Roman Catholic church was they were descended directly from the Apostles, in fact Peter was their first Pope. He said in fact so close are we that I can even walk on water like Jesus and he proceeded to walk on the water to the other side.

The Anglican Priest said the Anglican church was very similar in origin to the Catholics and he too demonstrated his ability to walk on water like Jesus Christ. The Baptist preacher said that he could not care where their origins were, he studied the word and preached it purely, and without any embellishments. Since they could walk on water he should be even better at it. He took one step forward and sunk knee deep into the river. As the Baptist preached flailed wildly in his attempts to stay afloat, the Roman Catholic Priest whispered to the Anglican Priest, "Do you think we should tell him where the rocks are?"

Children need to be taught where the rocks are by someone who loves them.

September 21, 2015

When Jesus wanted to illustrate what grace is like and how it operates He told this story:

"Then he said, "There was once a man who had two sons. The younger said to his father, 'Father, I want right now what's coming to me.' "So the father divided the property between them. It wasn't long before the younger son packed his bags and left for a distant country. There, undisciplined and dissipated, he wasted everything he had. After he had gone through all his money, there was a bad famine all through that country and he began to hurt. He signed on with a citizen there who assigned him to his fields to slop the pigs. He was so hungry he would have eaten the corncobs in the pig slop, but no one would give him any. "That brought him to his senses. He said, 'All those farmhands working for my father sit down to three meals a day, and here I am starving to death. I'm going back to my father. I'll say to him, Father, I've sinned against God, I've sinned before you; I don't deserve to be called your son. Take me on as a hired hand.' He got right up and went home to his father. "When he was still a long way off, his father saw him. His heart pounding, he ran out, embraced him, and kissed him. The son started his speech: 'Father, I've sinned against God, I've sinned before you; I don't deserve to be called your son ever again.' "But the father wasn't listening. He was calling to the servants, 'Quick. Bring a clean set of clothes and dress him. Put the family ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. Then get a grain-fed heifer and roast it. We're going to feast! We're going to have a wonderful time! My son is here—given up for dead and now alive! Given up for lost and now found!' And they began to have a wonderful time. "All this time his older son was out in the field. When the day's work was done he came in. As he approached the house, he heard the music and dancing. Calling over one of the houseboys, he asked what was going on. He told him, 'Your brother came home. Your father has ordered a feast—barbecued beef!—because he has him home safe and sound.' "The older brother stalked off in an angry sulk and refused to join in. His father came out and tried to talk to him, but he wouldn't listen. The son said, 'Look how many years I've stayed here serving you, never giving you one moment of grief, but have you ever thrown a party for me and my friends? Then this son of yours who has thrown away your money on whores shows up and you go all out with a feast!' "His father said, 'Son, you don't understand. You're with me all the time, and everything that is mine is yours—but this is a wonderful time, and we had to celebrate. This brother of yours was dead, and he's alive! He was lost, and he's found!'" Luke 15:11-32

You know this classic story as the "Prodigal Son". The word "prodigal" means "extravagant". 

Who was the real prodigal in this story when it comes to grace?

Right! The father!

Both boys were extravagant in their foolish abuses of grace! They illustrate the two ways grace is most often rendered ineffective.

The younger son exploited it. He took selfish advantage of the father's love and kindness. He took the money and ran because he could.

The older brother expected it. All he had ever known was the goodness and generosity of the father, so it lost its impact upon him. Grace is primarily about relationship and the older son lost his appreciation for his father.

While the younger son abused grace the older son refused it.

In your experience, aren't those the two most common ways we abuse grace? Regardless of which way we damage our relationship with God it is equally foolish and disgraceful. Let's call it what it is - sinful!

Will you take some time and reread this story?

Will you meditate on the love and grace of the Father?

Will you allow the Spirit to search you to see if their is any disgrace in your heart or mind that keeps you from knowing the grace of God?

September 20, 2015

"Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the door frames of your houses and on your gates." Deuteronomy 6:4-9

I remember the first times that I stepped up to the plate in baseball in high school and in college. I also happen to remember the last time I stepped to the plate in college.

Those are significant times in the life of a serious-minded baseball play so you tend to remember them. Each of those three times I stepped to the plate I connected with the baseball.

Actually, my first trip to the plate in high school the ball connected with me! The pitch broke in and hit me on the knuckles of my left hand. It really hurt but I figured since I got hit by a pitch I would get to go to first base, at least. But I didn't. The umpire ruled that since the ball hit my hand and my hand was considered part of the ball and so he called it a foul ball. So rather than getting to first base I was back in the batter's box with a one strike count and a couple of sore swollen knuckles.

The other two trips to the plate were memorable in more pleasant ways. Both time that I stepped to the place I connected with the ball and drove in runs with each hit.

I had been well prepared to step to the plate in each of those occasions because of all the times I had spent stepping to the plate in hitting practice under the instruction of coaches who knew about hitting.

In comparing Baseball to the growth pattern of a Christian, home plate is where winning begins and ends. Home plate, in this analogy is where you make your personal spiritual connection with God! It would be where you meet with God and He meets with you.

You need to know how to connect with God at home plate so you can teach your kid how to step up to the plate and connect with God. Connecting with God at home plate is where everything begins. Nothing happens until you step up to the plate and connect. The same is true spiritually.

How do you step up to the plate?

"If we confess your sins He is faithful and just to forgive our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness." I John 1:9

"For God so loved the world that He gave His only Begotten Son that whosoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life." John 3:16

"I urge you brothers, by the mercies of God, to offer yourselves as a living sacrifice holy and acceptable to God which is your reasonable service. And be not conformed to this world but be transformed by the renewing of your mind so that you will be able to know the good and perfect will of God." Romans 12:1-2 

God is waiting to connect with you. 

Do you need to connect with Him?

Do you need to reconnect?

Will you step up to the plate?

Will you confess your sins, turn from them and receive His salvation?

September 19, 2015

"Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you are to be on your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home ans when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the door frames of your houses and on your gates." Deuteronomy 6:4-9 

In this portion of Scripture God through Moses instructs the people of Israel on how to raise Home Run Kids.

First, make intentional time, V. 7

I found time to enjoy doing. teach my boys to play baseball and I had time to attend their games.I always seem to find time to do the things that matter most to me. 

It takes time to to raise kids! 

To make time to be with them enough you will have to borrow time from something else you enjoy doing. 

You will have time for hobbies when your kids are gone. While you have them, make enough time to be with them.

God commands you to make time to have spiritual formation time with your kide.

Second, make in time to talk, V. 7b

Again, intentional talk takes time!

1) Talk with them!

2) Talk to them!

3) Talk to God with them!

4) Talk about them!

5) Talk when:

·       You sit – Time to reinstate the dinner table

                        Schedule “dates” with your kids

·       You walk – Take advantage of travel time

·       You rise – Take advantage of morning time

·       You lie down – Take advantage of bed time

God commands you to talk to your kids about Him. And He also expects you to teach them to talk to God as well.

Third, make intentional truth, V. 7

Due to their fallen nature, your kids (like you) do not come by truth naturally. If left to themselves they will be led away and deceived.

1) Talk about the source of truth

God's Word is the only source of all that is true and right. Teach your kids that whatever the Bible says is true and anything that disputes the Bible is wrong.

2) Three big truths to teach:

• Creation – we are made by God
• Christ – we are saved by God’s love
• Community – we are led and united by the Holy Spirit

     Raising Home Run Kids is not easy and it requires intentional effort every day. It must begin by teaching your kid how to connect with God at Home Plate by taking the time, having the talks and teaching the important truths.

      Are you ready to step up to the plate?