April 3, 2010

"Love never fails." I Corinthians 13:8


What sort of a claim is that? Does this verse mean that if I love I will never make a mistake?

Are you kidding? Of course not.

So, then does it mean that if I love I will be successful at everything I try?

Hardly!

Well, is it promising that I will be right every time?

Dream on!

Does it mean that because I love golf I will par every hole on the course?

Are you serious?

Will I bowl a 300 game if I love bowling enough?

Get you mind out of the gutter!

Then what does it mean that love never fails if it doesn't mean any of those things?

What it means is that when I love with the love of God I will never fail to love! I will always do the loving thing. I will continue loving when I feel like it and when I don't. I will respond with love even when I have been rejected or when I have been hurt.

Love never fails because God is love and when you draw upon Him for love it will always be given.

There is no person or not circumstance that you will ever face where you cannot respond with love.

If you fail to love it is because your love for God has failed. If you love Him with an unfailing love and live in an unbroken relationship with Him your love will never fail because His never does!

Want a fail-safe love? Struggling with love? Find it difficult to be loving?

God has all the love you need. Don't fail to take it and use it!

April 2, 2010

"Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart." Psalm 37:4

Not many people get to live their dream. Some people never have a dream. A few live a nightmare.

The reason I am able to live my dream is twofold, God has been exceedingly gracious to me and a big part of that graciousness is His blessing me with a wife who has sacrificed to allow me to chase it.

How can two people become one if they don't share a dream or if they harbor competing dreams?

I believe that a couple should first discern the dream God has for their marriage and dedicate themselves to that above all. Then, I believe that each partner should be fully committed to helping each other chase their individual dreams. Obviously, their individual dreams should not come into conflict with their shared dream.

If you want to have a dream marriage don't be afraid to dream. But share God's dream and let God shape your dreams and then enjoy the pursuit!

Dreams do come true when you are true to the dreams that God planted in your spirit and to the person He partnered you with!

April 1, 2010

"Again, I tell you that if two of you on earth agree about anything you ask for, it will be done for you by my Father in heaven." Matthew 18:19

What happens when women get together? What do they usually talk about?

Their husbands, right?

What are men most likely to complain about?

Their wives.

What does talking about your spouse to other people accomplish?

No much that's positive, right?

What if when you talked to someone else about your spouse you talked to someone who could actually make a difference?

No, not Oprah. Not Dr. Phil.

How about talking to God? How about going to the One Who created you and created them and brought you together? Can you see how that might help?

Give it a try.

Once you get convinced on the value of that one get even more radical and pray together!

Our Scripture verse today makes an incredible promise of the power of agreeing together in prayer.

For the past couple of years Barbara and I have been praying together over several issues. Even though we didn't see those issues resolved or the prayers answered just the fact that we were taking them before God and doing it together was a tremendous help. Rather than worry individually we prayed together. Prayer kept us from despair. Prayer drew us together over some things that could have pushed us apart.

Just within the past several days two of those prayers were answered! It doubled our joy because we had shared the burden!

You will be talking about your spouse today. Why not talk to God about them?

You will be talking about God today. Why not talk to your spouse about Him?

You will be talking with each other today. Why not talk together to God?

Prayer keeps you from despair.

March 31, 2010

"Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light for my path." Psalm 119:105

Leonard Ravenhill said, "Love is blind but marriage is an eye-opener."

There certainly is a degree to which we go into marriage blindly. But, by the same token we go into life blindly in the sense that we don't know what the future holds.

Acknowledging that fact the Psalmist understood the importance of being guided by One Who did know the future, his God. He turned to the Word of God to light the way to his future.

That sounds like a good idea.

The one who wrote this Psalm understood that we need direction from God for our next step and for the path ahead of us. Life is too important to spend it walking in the dark because first of all you can get lost, secondly you would not know that you are lost and if you did discover you were lost you would not be able to find your way back!

Ever walk into a dark room and feel along the wall for the light switch? You wouldn't want to live like that would you?

Can you imagine getting in your car at midnight to begin a trip to California and not turn your healights on? You would never do that. You might get out of town by the lights of the street lights and the other ambient lighting, but you would not get very far once you hit the darkness beyond. If you didn't hit something then someone else might hit you.

We need light! We need it in our individual path and we need it in our walk as husband and wife. Marriage is challenging enough without attempting it in the dark!

What better to light our way than the Word of God? And the Word of God tells us that God is Light. Light represents His wisdom and His knowledge and His Truth. We need that Word to be a lamp, or we would say, a flashlight to illuminate our next step. As we read His Word and listen to His voice, God will show us the way for our next step.

But we also need His light to illuminate our path, the course of our life and of our lives together. By knowing His Word and understanding it and obeying it we can know where our final destination will be. While God will not reveal all the details and events that will unfold, He can shine the light on our final destination.

And, His light is a searchlight that He shines in the inner recesses of our heart and mind to reveal anything that is not right. If there is darkness in us it will impair our ability to see the light before us. Knowing the right things and having the wrong things exposed is a crucial function of God's light.

You wouldn't drive in total darkness. Nor would you walk down a dark alley. So why would you walk blindly through marriage?

God has all the light you need! It is shining in His Word. It will be a flashlight and a headlight and searchlight to guide you safely and successfully.

Flip the switch!

March 30, 2010

"Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed." Proverbs 15:22

This week we move into the Final Four of the NCAA Basketball Tournament, one of the biggest events in the world of sports. Millions will tune into to watch the semi-finals and the championship games.

When I look at the four teams remaining in the chase for the championship I notice a common denominator - three of them have veteran coaches. Two of those coaches have won national championships before.

All four of these teams have tall and talented players. All of them have winning traditions. Both Duke and Michigan State have multiple final four appearances. But if you ask the one thing that separates these elite teams from the others you would have to point to Duke's Coach K, Michigan State's Coach Izzo, and West Virginia's Coach Huggins. They set themselves apart with their ability to coach teams to a championship level. It is not that their players are far more talented than the other teams, it is their ability to motivate and mentor those players into an effective team.

Tall, talented, teen-aged basketball stars don't naturally play championship level winning basketball. They are prone to play for themselves rather than for the team. It takes a Tom Izzo, or a Mike Krzyzewski, or a Bob Huggins to mold these talented kids into a smoothly functioning unit.

So, if it takes exceptional coaching to shape championship teams, what makes us think we can build strong marriages without help?

It is called accountability. It is called discipline. It is called coaching not because it creates talent but because it unifies and maximizes it. If we naturally did our best or automatically did everything we know we should do, we could go it alone. But let's be honest - we don't!

If it takes world-class coaches to mold world-class athletes into world-class teams what do think would help build world-class marriages?

So, why don't you have someone coaching or mentoring you?

Why are you going it alone?

Who do you know that you could ask to come along side of you and your spouse to help coach you and call out the best in your marriage?

When will you ask them?

March 29, 2010

"Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth." I Corinthians 13:6

The problem with sin is that it complicates life. It complicates life because it confuses your understanding of truth. When the line gets blurred between truth and lies, life gets tough in a hurry.

That is exactly what happened with Adam and Eve and it has become the story of humanity. It is essentially the story of history.

So, fast forward to your marriage and our truth for the day reminds us that love is directly and intricately connected with truth. The question then becomes, "What is truth?"

Truth is a Person!

Jesus said, "I am the Way, the Truth, and the Life. No man comes to the Father but by me." When Jesus made that statement He was not saying He is a concept or a system of beliefs, He IS TRUTH! Truth starts and ends in HIM! If you want to know truth you must know Him! Nothing is true apart from Him! So, when this verse says that love rejoices in truth it makes a lot of sense when you understand that truth is not a thing it is a Person! Isn't it much easier to love a person? Especially when that Person is Jesus! Want love in your marriage? Get Jesus! Want truth in your marriage? Get Jesus!

Truth is Purity!

Because truth is a Person and that Person is Jesus, you need to get Jesus. In order to get Jesus you must repent of sin and renounce it in your life. You must cleanse your heart and mind of moral impurity. I John 1:8-9 affirms this: "If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness." That's what I am talking about! Get rid of the impurity of sin and receive the purity of His righteousness. And righteousness is "rightness". Also, back up a couple of verses to I John 1:7 and it sheds more truth on truth: "But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us from all sin." "Walk in the light". What is light but truth? As you walk in truth you walk in purity!

Truth Is Power!

When you have Jesus you have purity. When you have Jesus and purity you will have power. The power of truth! The power of holiness! The power of rightness!

Love rejoices in truth! Make that "truth" with a capital "T"!

March 28, 2010

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7ikm3o5hDks

Now that is crazy love! Cats are not supposed to love rats! Rats are supposed to be afraid of rats!

When I think that someone like Barbara would love someone like me – that is crazy love!

Remember when your children were born – especially that first one because you are unprepared for it – when they hand that like wrinkled, wet, pink, squalling thing to you and suddenly you are flooded with this CRAZY LOVE!

For this 40-Day Focus we have been talking a lot about love. What it is and what it isn’t and what it ought to be. We have been reading our Love Dare books and doing our LIFE Group studies. We have walked around and talked around this crazy thing called love but today I want to hit right at the heart of it. I WANT TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT CRAZY LOVE!

This love I am going to talk to you about is crazier than a cat loving a rat. It is crazier than Barbara loving me. It is even crazier and more intense than the love we have for our kids! This CRAZY LOVE is the unconditional love He has for us and wants us to have for our marriage partner.

Are you ready to hear about CRAZY LOVE?

“God commended His love toward us in that while we were still sinners Christ died for us.” Romans 5:8

I. LOVE IS CRAZY POWERFUL – “God…..”

"Love is blind. Marriage is an eye-opener." --Leonard Ravenhill

Phillip Yancey describes grace in his book What’s So Amazing About Grace. He writes, “Grace means there is nothing we can do to make God love us more—no amount of spiritual calisthenics and renunciations, no amount of knowledge gained from seminaries, no amount of crusading on behalf of righteous causes. And grace means there is nothing we can do to make God love us less—no amount of racism or pride or pornography or adultery or even murder. Grace means that God already loves us as much an infinite God can possibly love.”
Does it help to think that God delights in you? Think about it! I don’t care how ugly you think you are. You are God’s delight. I don’t care how fat you are. You are God’s delight. Even if your marriage seems such a struggle. You are God’s delight. Even if you are divorced, your self-esteem wrecked. You are God’s delight. Even if you are so depressed your life feels like a black hole. You are God’s delight. Even if you threw a pity party and nobody showed up. You are God’s delight. God doesn’t abandon you because your business collapsed. You are God’s delight. God doesn’t leave you because you’re face is all wrinkled. You are God’s delight. Now, instead of wasting all that energy trying to prove to everybody that you are worth something, you can start with this idea that you already are somebody because we are the one in whom God delights!

The reason that God’s crazy love is so powerful is because love is not just what God does IT IS WHO HE IS! God loves because HE IS LOVE! It is His character! It is His nature! It is His DNA!

It is impossible for Him to NOT love you! For Him to not love you He would have to NOT BE HIM! And He is immutable – HE NEVER CHANGES. Since He never changes He will ALWAYS LOVE!

And His love is a CRAZY love! The word for His love is “agape” and there is really not English equivalent for it – so the closest I can come is CRAZY!

HAVE YOU COME TO THE PLACE WHERE YOU BELIEVE HIS CRAZY LOVE?

II. LOVE IS CRAZY PERSONAL – “……commended His love toward US….”

BUT HEY – the news gets better!

Many world religions teach a god who is a loving force or a cosmic warm fuzzy and we find love by becoming “one” with this – whatever is is……

Christianity teaches a personal love from a personal God Who wants to live in a personal relationship with every member of His creation.

A HOLY ALMIGHTY GOD WHO PERSONALLY LOVES ME AND WANTS TO KNOW ME? THAT”S CRAZY!

KARL BARTH was a German theologian who dominated the theology of the 20th century. In 1962, six years before his death, he made his only visit to the United States. One night he lectured at a seminary in Virginia, and after the lecture he met with students in the coffee shop for some informal dialogue. Someone asked him if there was any way he could summarize his vast theological findings. A student asked, "What in your judgment is the essence of the Christian faith?" Barth paused for a moment. No doubt the others waited for some profound insights from this theological giant. They got their pens and paper out and were poised. Then Barth answered, "Yes, I can summarize in a few words my understanding of the Christian faith. Let me put it this way: "Jesus Loves Me, This I Know, for the Bible Tells Me So."Needless to say, these students were dumbfounded. They expected some deep theological statement and instead heard that which Barth learned at his mother’s knees.I believe Barth was right. At the heart of the Christian gospel is this simple affirmation: JESUS LOVES ME!

Max Lucado: "If God had a refrigerator, your picture would be on it. If he had a wallet, your photo would be in it. He sends you flowers every spring and a sunrise every morning. Whenever you want to talk, he’ll listen."

I SEARCHED FOR EFFECTIVE WAYS TO ILLUSTRATE THIS CRUCIAL POINT AND DECIDED A PICTURE IS WORTH A 1,000 WORDS – WATCH THIS:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r_wu61fbtMI

God’s love is powerful because He IS LOVE! It is not a concept, it is not a theory, it not a feeling or an emotion – it is HIM!

And it is even more powerful because IT IS PERSONAL. It is available for you to receive and experience! It is yours for the believing!

HAVE YOU PERSONALLY RECEIVED THE POWERFUL PERSONAL LOVE OF GOD? WOULD YOU LIKE TO?

III. LOVE IS CRAZY PROVEN – “….while we were still sinners CHRIST DIED FOR US”

The young woman was married and had two beautiful children, but one day as she was standing over the sink, washing dishes, she thought, "There must be more to life than this."When her husband came home, he found a note she’d written and he began to weep. She would call him about once every week to check on the children, and he would always tell her of his great love for her and beg her to come home. She would always say no and hang up.Finally, he hired a private investigator to find her. He went to the apartment where she was staying, nervously holding a spray of flowers in his hand as he stood at the door. He had rehearsed over and over what he would say and he finally got up the nerve to knock on the door. She opened the door and he started to speak, but she suddenly began to weep and fell into his arms. She managed to say through her tears, "Let’s go home." Months after, when things were starting to heal, he finally asked her something that had been bothering him. "All those times I talked to you on the phone; I asked you to come back and you refused. Why did you come back now?" "Before," she started, tears in her eyes, "you were just telling me that you loved me. When you came, you showed me."

We knew that God loved us, but when He really wanted to prove it He sent His Son Jesus to lay down His life for us! God’s love got personally involved!

God has always loved us with a crazy love, but nothing proved it like when He sent Jesus!

In the “Fireproof” movie what was it that finally convinced Catherine that Caleb loved her? For over forty days he had tried to show kindness and consideration and patience – but she didn’t finally believe his love until he proved it by spending his boat savings on her mom’s medical equipment. That was crazy love!

He finally became convinced of her love when she cancelled the divorce papers.

Love is proved by actions. Crazy love has to be shown by crazy acts of loving sacrifice, God did that by sending His Son. To any fair-minded person there can be no doubt!

We have been camping out in Ephesians 5 this month and it talks a lot about God’s crazy love for The Church! He loves it like a bride! And then he tells us the most amazing thing – crazy actually. He tells us that we are to love our spouse just like God loves the church – WITH A CRAZY LOVE.

(LEAVING AND CLEAVING – BUNGEE JUMP)

ARE YOU READY TO TAKE A PLUNGE INTO HIS CRAZY LOVE?

ARE YOU WILLING TO LET HIS CRAZY LOVE FLOW THROUGH YOU TO YOUR SPOUSE?

ARE YOU WILLING AS A COUPLE TO PLUNGE YOUR MARRIAGE INTO HIS CRAZY LOVE?

"The first miracle Jesus performed was at a wedding. Jesus can still do a miracle with your wedding." --Kent Crockett