".....and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight." Proverbs 3:5-6
Houdini, the magician, walked across a tight wire high above Niagara Falls. The high wire is stretched tight high above Niagara Falls, and Houdini asks the audience watching from the bleachers whether or not he can walk across that falls high on that high wire. Houdini calls to the people in the bleachers, “Do you believe that I can walk on the high wire across the falls.” The crowd chants back, “Yes, you can do it.”
Houdini then loads a wheel barrow onto that high wire and calls to the crowds, “Do you believe that I can take that wheel barrow on the high wire across Niagara Falls?” “Yes,” they shout. “You can do it.”
Then Houdini takes a wheel barrow and fills that wheel barrow with a sack of sand, weighing a hundred and fifty pounds.” Houdini calls to the crowds, “Can I take the wheelbarrow with the 150 pounds of sand across the high wire?” The crowd thunders at the top of their voices, “Yes, you can do it.”
Then Houdini pauses and quietly asks for a volunteer to get into the wheel barrow and Houdini will take them on the high wire across Niagara Falls. No one volunteers. "No, no, no. We don't want to do that."
It is one thing to believe that the high wire walker could move 150 pounds across the wire, but it quite another thing to believe in him, to put your life in his hands, to get into the wheelbarrow and have him ferry you across to the other side of the falls. You have to REALLY believe IN him to do that. To trust your life fully in his hands.
Have you discovered that one of the things that makes it tough to fully trust God is trusting what He can go in you?
It is hard to fully "lean into" Him when you are doubting His ability to use you. Doubting what God can do in you is in fact, doubting Him.
I know I struggled for years with surrendering to His calling on my life. My problem was that I have serious doubts whether I could do the job He was calling me to do. I told myself that I trusted Him I just didn't trust myself. I was leaning to my own understanding of what I though I was able to do.
My Youth Pastor set me straight when he challenged me with this admonition, "God's call is your enablement. Are you telling me that you can trust God to call you to ministry but you can't trust Him to enable you to accomplish the task?"
As I thought about it I had to admit that was EXACTLY what I was saying. Once I admitted it I had to confess it for the sin it was. Though I said I trusted Him I was unwilling to get into His wheelbarrow.
Confessing the sinful way I had been thinking, I began "leaning fully into Him" and "leaned away from my own understanding."
Now, more than 40 years later I can clearly see how His calling really has been my enablement!
Have you been "leaning into your own understanding" rather than trusting Him?